You said that I don’t listen to your advice and that I don’t think that you’re important to me but how much do you know about what I feel deep down inside?
You want me to do something that I’m so afraid of. I know you care for me, that’s why you ask me to give him up but I know that I can’t do so because I know that I will be so afraid of it. At first I thought you were just kidding but I never thought that you’re serious. You know one thing? I never like having the feeling of insecure. Maybe that is why I don’t have the courage to give him up because I know that I need someone to love me and be mine yet I know very well that you can’t do that because you can’t accept me for who I am.

It doesn’t matter whether you can accept me or not. What matters most is that you said I don’t think you’re any important at all. It really hurts to hear you saying that. You have no idea how much I care for you and how important you are to me. Sometimes I felt so bad that I really want to tell you what I feel but I just can’t. I don’t want to give myself a false hope and I don’t want to make you feel bad either. Most of all, I did not have the courage to face the possibility of losing you. I don’t want our relationship to change, I like it the way it was where I have a brother who cares so much of me.

And please don’t be mad at me…..you just don’t know that you mean the world to me. I am so afraid of you being mad at me…I never liked it at all. I told you I don’t know why but I know myself why I felt like that. I love you, H….although I never say it but can't you feel it?